North to Alaska

It looks like we will be heading to Alaska this August or September to visit the kids. It is hard to pick a time that won't be catastrophic for a subsistence farm. If you are going to go, you might as well stay for a couple of weeks, by that time we should have worn out our welcome at all three of my kids places and everyone will be as happy to see us go as they were to see us arrive. It doesn't matter who you are or how much you love the people you are visiting, you are a disruption. Everyone is on their best behavior and that gets old pretty quick.

The truth is everyone likes being their frumpy self. There is a public persona that varies with your audience and then their is the you without pretence. It is hard to get up in the morning and look accross the table and see your dad eyeballing you and thinking something. All you wanted was coffee and quiet before pulling on your work persona and heading out the door.

One thing that works pretty well, is borrowing a vehicle and wandering around during the day by ourselves. This gives the visitee some privacy and allows Kris and I to explore on our own. In the evening, we meet back up and we tell of our adventures and get tips on where to go the next day. A nice dinner, a drink or two and off to bed. We can spend three or four days in each home and then head off to the next.

This should work well in Alaska. I imagine it is so different and so large that two weeks will seem way too short. There will be grandchildren to visit and parenting advice to give. (Parents love to get parenting advice and is one of many reasons they want to accompany you to the airport when you go just to make sure the plane doesn't leave without you.) I really do fight the urge to offer advice. It usually is not helpful and it is always unwanted. Your kids have already seen more years of your parenting than they wanted and are trying to do a better job. There seems to be a pattern of my kids moving further and further away from Maine. If I offer too much parenting advice, the next move could be Asia-- somewhere out in the middle.

That leaves fishing and travel for safe topics and activities. I should be able to impress them with my fishing prowess. It is my experience that the further I go and the more expensive and elaborate the trip, the less likely it is I will catch anything. All things considered, I will be the only person to ever fish in Alaska and not get a bite. "The fishing was awesome," isn't exactly a lie. It was awesome to the people who actually caught fish. As long as you don't get any follow up questions, you can leave it at that and avoid pure fish stories.

Anyway, Alaska is going to be an adventure, one I've been dreaming about for a long time. From the pictures we get periodically, it is going to be worth the wait.